The fast ended last week, it was 21 days long. The outcome of this fast is that I have a clearer picture of how much I need God's saving grace! I have become reminded of how worldly I am, how I follow my flesh reactions so often.
The first week I set aside Jeremiah's first nap time, when we usually are getting lots of schooling done and prayed with the kids. I tried not to have a predetermined notion of how I thought it would go, with their shorter attention spans. They did well. We talked before we started about making a prayer list, listening to God and worshiping with our whole attention and hearts focused on Him. It was good, now I want to keep that as a part of our days. It is difficult to make time to stop and pray, but it is a good thing to do. I tried to model prayer and waiting before the Lord, but it was hard with them interrupting! It didn't feel like I was really focused on the fast or on my time with God. I know He understands and He was faithful to meet me in those moments.
Toward the end of the fast I was getting pretty frazzled, with Gaylen gone. That was part of the Lord working in me, though. I really came to the end of myself and then relied on God. I wish I would've gotten to the "rely on God" part a little sooner, it would've been so much more peaceful than me doing it on my own!
I want to do another fast, to stay focused on the Lord. I want to stay in that place of closeness with Him, meditating on the goodness of His life giving Word.